Eureka! I Found Me!
- John-Michael Scurio
- a few seconds ago
- 6 min read
I started this blog - www.iloveureka.com - in 2018.
For one reason or another, it all just started to organically pour out of me from my heart and soul, often with ease, just shortly after I started to experience daily life in Eureka Springs, Arkansas.
It was my outlet.
It facilitated joy.
It brought peace and tranquility.
That was in October 2018, just four short months after moving to Eureka and after constantly saying the phrase over and over again to my partner Jeff, "I love Eureka!" everywhere we went, everything we experienced, every local we met.
Then BAM! Voila!
A blog is born.
"Finding Eureka helped me find me."
I Wasn’t Put Here to Shout. I Was Put Here to Shine.
Early on, locals asked Jeff and I if we had a business - we said no. People asked if we were retired - we said no. Do you have family here? - no! Are you building property on some land here? - no!
The questions poured in, and yet, it remained a small mystery; WE remained a small mystery.
Who are these city slickers?
Why are they here?
How do they live?
What do they do?
Then, more questions . . .
Are you planning to volunteer, or join city council?
CAPC? Parks and Rec? Are you teachers? Journalists?
Are you philanthropic?
How do you contribute?
Do you want to be on a board of directors?
Then, after time passes, that moment occurs when someone suddenly hands you a label you didn’t ask for. This happened to me when someone private messaged me telling me how much they absolutely love my blog, but that they feel that I am not using my homosexuality loudly enough, aggressively enough, or visibly enough to stand up, call out, rally against, or confront those who speak out against the LGBTQIA+ community.
I exhaled. Sipped my dry Chard, ruminated and, poof, my answer appeared in my mind, and I gently spoke the truth without apology:
They’re absolutely right. I don’t do those things. But not because I don’t care. Not because I’m disengaged. Not because I’m comfortable at someone else’s expense. I don’t do them because that is not why I am here.
My Purpose Was Never a Megaphone
Some souls arrive on this planet with a fire in their chest and a megaphone in their hands. They are warriors.
Disruptors.
Marchers.
Boundary-pushers.
Truth-shouters.
...and the world needs them.
But not every light is a flare.
Some of us arrive as lanterns. Flashlights. Fireflies. Dragonflies. Lamps. Butterflies. Candles. Nightlights. Twinkle Lights. Stars.
We are steady and enduring.
We love to guide. We are unmistakable, once you notice the glow.
"My friends, I know this in my heart ... I was not put here to argue people into kindness." /John-Michael Scurio
I was also not put here to shame people into inclusion.
I was also not put here to win debates or scorch the earth in the name of righteousness.
I was put here to find joy, experience joy, and model joy. I believe this so completely. It is undeniable.
Do I write about community dynamics, kindness, joy, inclusion, homosexuality, love, and much more. Sure. But it is not my intention to use the blog platform to shame, argue, win or debate. It is to educate and spread joy, love, community and inclusion.
Joy Is Not Passive. It Is Radical.
Please allow me to say this clearly, because it matters:
Choosing joy as a gay man is not weak.
Living openly, softly, beautifully is not cowardice.
Refusing to live in a constant state of outrage is not indifference.
Joy is resistance.
Joy is visibility.
Joy is saying, “I survived. I arrived. I am here. And I am well.”
For some people, activism looks like a protest sign
For me, activism looks like being right next to Jeff, both joyful, bright lights, living our best life chapter and loving every minute of it. Normalizing our visibility as a long-term committed gay couple and basking in our joy.
I'd go on to say that, for me, activism also looks like:
A town where queer people walk hand in hand without flinching
Blog-posts that make people feel safer just by reading them
A long dinner table filled with laughter, love and lots of wonderful conversations
A life so clearly lived in truth that it disrupts fear without confrontation
I don’t fight darkness head-on.
I simply turn on the light and let darkness decide what to do next.
When Jeff turns on his light, and I also turn on mine - we're utterly unstoppable.
When both lights are shining bright, side-by-side, darkness has no place in our experience.
The Power of a Blog That Refuses to Be Angry
www.iloveureka.com was never meant to be a manifesto.
It is not a platform built on outrage.
It is not fueled by takedowns or callouts or viral conflict.
It is a love letter.
I write about:
Porch conversations that heal without knowing they’re healing
Small-town magic that makes space for everyone
Joy that sneaks up on you while you’re buying coffee in the cutest shop ever
Beauty that exists quietly, persistently, and without permission
And here’s what some people often totally miss:
Visibility doesn’t always have to look like confrontation.
Sometimes it quite simply looks like normalization.
I applaud the many that took to the front curbs of Chick-fil-A chains across the nation in 2012 when Chick-fil-A voiced their opposition about same-sex marriage. Many LGBTQIA+ couples puckered up in protest all across the nation staging "kiss-ins" outside Chick-fil-A locations.
This, my friends, to me, is exactly my kind of activism ...
... simply displays of loving your special person.
...and joy.
...and normalization.
...and visibility.
When I write about spreading love and joy in Eureka Springs, Arkansas, I am writing about a place where:
Being gay is unremarkable
Being different is expected
Being yourself is not a performance, but a given
You’re met with curiosity instead of caution
Joy is practiced daily, not saved for special occasions
No one flinches when you live out loud
People let you arrive as yourself and stay that way
Community is built through presence, not performance
Love doesn’t need defending because it already lives here
Eureka Springs Didn’t Ask Me to Fight. It Asked Me to Belong.
Eureka Springs is not loud about its inclusivity.
It doesn’t need to be.
It simply is what it is.
It’s a town that says:
"Come as you are"
"Stay as long as you like"
"We’ve been waiting for you"
"You belong here."
In Eureka Springs, rainbow flags aren’t statements. They’re punctuation.
Here, queerness isn’t political. It’s personal.
Here, joy isn’t performative. It’s practiced every day.
Eureka Springs didn’t need another activist shouting into the ether. (...and I certainly am not that person.)
Eureka needed more love, more joy, and someone to get the word out.
And so that's what I do. That's my activism.
I Am Not Here to Be a Symbol. I Am Here to Be a Signal.
I am not the gay man who stands at the front of the line with a clenched fist and a scowl.
I am the gay man sitting on a bench, smiling, living well, writing in my journal, loving deeply and welcoming every passerby.
I take pride on being radically inclusive. Everyone has a story, and I believe that it isn't my place to disregard someone because of their story.
You don’t have to be angry to be valid
You don’t have to be loud to be powerful
You don’t have to fight every battle to win your life
My existence is not an argument.
It is an invitation.
This beautiful, strange, joy-soaked life of mine has taught me how to use my light and Eureka helped me find me. I wholeheartedly believe that I am in this neck of the woods to be living proof that happiness is possible.
Not someday. Not after permission. Not once the world is fixed. Now.
And I will keep writing, keep loving, keep joy-spotting; where my light doesn’t shout, and it never goes out.
Eureka! I found me!❤️